Re: Is it OK to do that?
Wow has this thread touched on some touchy stuff. And no matter what we all aren't going to agree. There are a few basic principle here that you (getforfree) need to look at and then simply make a choice.
1. Nothing is free. Someone somewhere pays for it. The price may be paid indirectly (like from taxes) or by someone else in another fashion. (Aka higher priced goods so that those coupons work, or a higher general mark up on goods to cover 'freebies'). Free, by most people's definition means it had no direct cost for them, but nothing in life is truly free. Someone somewhere pays some sort of price, you have to ask yourself if you are saving money at someones else's expense and to what degree that is alright. (In my opinion coupons are alright! They are just trying to 'hook you' to the product or the store to make it up. They can always choose not to make the coupon! I can't choose not to pay taxes..unless I want to go to jail..and I don't.)
2. Self-sufficiency - You are responsible for you and your children. It's you and your SO others job to take care of your children. No it's not always easy or even feasible, that's why there are systems out there to help. However, that doesn't change your & SO's responsiblity....if that is not your goal .... then in my opion there is a problem.
3. Helping others - You can't really help others until you have a surplus. Yes there are many acts of service that do not require money and you can do that, but that takes time and you have presious little of it from the sounds of things. Helping those less fortuate than ourselves should be high on our priority list in my opinion. There are few things I find in life that are more fulfilling. If you are so stressed for time and money, then you have no time and money to help others.
4. Accountablility - You are responsible for your choices and the consequences of them. What I think or what anyone on this board thinks is just that. In the end you make the choice and deal with the consequences. What gets my grip is then when people complain about the consequences. Choose one....choose the other....end of story.
Do the best you can, the best you know how. In my opion, and again this is just an opinion, if you are depending on others, (in this case WIC), then you are not self-sufficient. If I was in your situation I would be looking for ways to no longer need that assistance. I would not fudge things to qualify because to me that is not honest, and I don't want to deal with those 'consequences' that will surly come up.
All this being said, my family lived off of assisantce programs for food for most of my childhood. I think there were many times my parents took advantage of the system, and I don't think that is right. But I know they were doing the best they knew how. Because I know my family used the generousity of others for years I habitually donate to the fund that feed my family for years and I know that the money is going to feed other families. If I was not self-sufficient I could not do this.
Remember, on a side note, what you are teaching your children. They see your example and will mimic you. This in many families has created a generation of children who were raised on welfare and since that is all then know, they are raising yet another generation on welfare. This is not right, this is not what welfare was created for. Make sure as your family grows that yes, you teach them to save and stay out of debt, but also that you teach them to care for themselves and their families in such a way that they can help others.
I think you are doing a good job, don't take anything I said offensively, it was not meant that way in any shape or form. Just look inside and try and understand the reasons you are doing what you are doing. For years I did things certain ways, only because the light bulb had not come on, and I had never learned any different. It's really your core values and charateristics that count.
Good Luck!
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A fantasy becomes a dissatisfaction. A dissatisfaction becomes a desire. A desire becomes a want. A want becomes a need. A need becomes a matter of life and death. --Concept taken from "My Year Without Spending"
Thoughts lead to acts, acts lead to habits, habits lead to character - and our character will determine our eternal destiny. -- Ezra Taft Benson
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