Jugging In-Laws During Holidays

[Fern]

This isn't money-related, but just curious how others handle visiting family members of their spouse or Sig. other during the holidays.

Do you see one family Xmas eve, the other on Xmas day? Do you take turns one year seeing one family, seeing the other family on Thanksgiving?

Or some other arrangement?

[njAndrew]

I am in the lucky (maybe) situation of living close to both sides of the family (mine and wifes). We do the run around on thanksgiving, one side for dinner and the other for dessert. For x-mas we go to my in-laws for Xmas eve and my parents for Xmas day. I hate the run around on thanksgiving but everybody wants to see our child (not us) so we do it for the day.

Andrew

[cercis]

This year we live 13 hours from family.

I broke my mother's heart and told her I wasn't coming home for xmas. I just couldn't do it. I get 2 days off from work and the thought of traveling for 4 days total (including the travel time) with the stress of xmas expecations (hers not mine) was too much for me.

In years past, we spent xmas morning with my mom and then xmas night with his mom. Xmas eve was either at our house or at his mom's. We always stayed with his mom (lower expectations).

Thanksgiving hasn't been a big thing for my family since my dad's aunt died and we all grew up and moved away. So that was time we could spend with DH's dad.

[jodi]

Thanksgiving: Dinner at 12pm at my brother's house with all my family, then travel 1.5 hours to have a second dinner at 6pm with DH's family at his parents house Yum, two dinners...of course we are so full we can barely move.
Christmas: pre-kids, we would spend Christmas Eve at my aunts house, travel 1.5 hours that night to DH's parents, spend Christmas morning there, and be back to my parents house for dinner at 1pm. Now that we have two boys, we want them to be able to wake up at home on Christmas. We will probably invite DH's family down Christmas eve, spend Christmas day at home with my family, then travel to see Dh's family the day after.

[cercis]

Jodi, I always wanted my kids to get to wake up in their own beds for xmas. DH doesn't care so much. And my mom is adament that she has to see us at xmas, but heaven forbid SHE actually travel.

Now, I have a perfect excuse, except, dh's family is driving down to be with us. They're staying in 2 condos on the island so we'll either have to stay with them or drive an hour away. And it's my first xmas in my new home pout.

[Snoopy2645]

My MIL is on the other side of the country so we dont go thier for the holidays so its just my mom here. But growing up we always split holidays between my moms parents & my dads parents we would go to my one grandparents on xmas even then stay home xmas day then do xmas again on new years day at my other grandparents house.

[Luv2shop]

I cook thanksgiving dinner at my house (for 9). Every year I have A christmas Eve party at my house. Most of the time we go to my mom's for Christmas dinner.

[PrincessPerky]

We live in NC, family is all far far away. so Christmas is usually just us, so calm, so peaceful, so NICE!

but this year the ILs will be comming down soo.... I am hoping we can do a christmas eve or day after thing anyway.

[DivaJen]

We're lucky in that both sides of the family get along well and we all live fairly close by. My IL's live in town; my parents live about 3-4 hours (driving) away. For Thanksgiving we drove out to my parents' house. For Christmas the last few years my parents have come to our house, and then both sides of the family get together for Christmas dinner. When DH's brother and girlfriend can come out from back east, we've gotten together Christmas Eve as well. Last year, and the year before IIRC, we went to my IL's for Christmas dinner. I think we're going to do it here this year.

Growing up, every third Christmas was spent in No. Cal at one grandparents' house, Indiana at the other grandparents' house, and at our house. My DD has spent all of her Christmas mornings here at our house, though her first Christmas we did drive out to my mom and dad's house later that day.

[PRICEPLUS]

Everyone is within a 1 1/2 hour driving range at the outside. My family is all within 45 minutes or less. DW family is further afield. X-mas we stay home although we used to travel. Thanksgiving we travel rarely as we are centrally located.

[robex]

The tricky part is not in handling in law visits, but my divorced parents who refuse to speak or be in the same room with oneanother...very pleasant indeed!

We see my Dad on Christmas Eve, and then trade off between my family and Dh's every year. This year my brother will be spending Christmas with my Mom and my family will be going to sil's house.

We have a big open house gathering on December 27 at our house and I invite EVERYBODY. I don't worry about my parents and their immature antics. For all I care, they can come at opposite times, all at once, or not at all! It's usually not at all because, God forbid they run into eachother and have to say "Hi."... Dh and I always joke that our household is divorce free because whoever leaves has to take the kids, so no one is going anywhere--but I think that's a different post!

[abowers]

[quote=cercis]And my mom is adament that she has to see us at xmas, but heaven forbid SHE actually travel. QUOTE]

Sounds like my mom.

We moved from upstate NY (where my parents are) to NJ this summer. My sig. other's parents lived in upstate NY too, until this past July when they moved to Florida. Things were easy when everyone was in the same city!

We went to my parents in upstate NY for 4 days at Thanksgiving. I only have a couple days off from work around Christmas, and we haven't seen his parents new place in Florida at all yet, so we are going down there for a few days around Christmas. I was thinking about trying to go down there for a couple days before christmas, then fly up to NY for christmas, then getting back to NJ to work on Tuesday the 27th, but then I realized I don't really feel like being on a plane for so much time on the whole 5 days I have off for the holidays.

My dad was ok with us not coming to NY for Christmas, but my mom is being nasty to me about it, and expect us to get back up to NY sometime around Christmas. Nevermind the fact that they could come visit us in NJ--!?

It's been stressful dealing with my mom.