Help! 40th Birthday Coming and DH Tends to Spend Big!

rduell · #1 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 02:29 AM

My 40th birthday is less than a month away and I just know that DH is going to go overboard. I have no idea what he's planning, if anything yet, but he is the one in the family that puts things on the credit card and doesn't realize how long it takes to pay them off.

For his 40th last spring I did something big, well big for us anyway. I saved up for months and took him to the Poconos for a weekend to attend a Nascar race. He's been a fan for a few years and had never actually attended a race. He works so hard providing for all of us, so I wanted to do something that he would really remember. He is always very giving so I wanted to give back to him for once.

He really doesn't have the opportunity to save money since I do the budgeting and bill paying. So I know that any expenses are going to get charged to the CC.

I would like to come up with an idea for my 40th that will be fairly cheap but is also something that he'll think is special. Any ideas?

Broken Arrow · #2 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 04:53 AM

Um, secretly swap out his credit card for a Visa gift card?

You know, you get to have a 40th birthday only once in your life... and since you did something "big" on his 40th, I think turn-around is fair play here. Perhaps it's best to just brace for a good time and have fun.

Ima saver · #3 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 07:52 AM

I would suggest just a nice dinner out! Or maybe a party at home?? I have always wanted to have a birthday party!

tinapbeana · #4 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 08:14 AM

save up and pay off something on your goal list for 2007? only if it would make you happy to do so, of course! otherwise: ask slave labor. i'm always a fan of having dishes done and dinner cooked for me.

Ima saver · #5 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 08:15 AM

Tina, I need to clone my husband. He does all the cooking and all the housework!!

rduell · #6 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tinapbeana

save up and pay off something on your goal list for 2007? only if it would make you happy to do so, of course! otherwise: ask slave labor. i'm always a fan of having dishes done and dinner cooked for me.

I love the idea of paying off a debt, but DH won't.

He's going to expect to be able to spend the same on me that I spent on him and that will max out the CC! I do not want to do that!

tinapbeana · #7 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rduell

I love the idea of paying off a debt, but DH won't.

He's going to expect to be able to spend the same on me that I spent on him and that will max out the CC! I do not want to do that!

well, you might just need to get blunt about it.

"honey, i got you something that i specifically knew you would like for your birthday, right? and therefore it is OK for me to expect YOU to get ME something I would specifically like for MY birthday, right? well, i paid $XXX.XX for your birthday trip last year, and what would make me happier than ANYTHING ELSE is is to have that exact same amount PAID OFF on the CC. it's my birthday, and that's what i want."

dunno if it would work, but it might be worth a shot...

PrincessPerky · #8 (**permalink**) 12-11-2006, 09:31 AM

Now there is the tough job, give him a germ of an idea, that you REALLY want, that isn't debt, because in all likelyhood he doesn't think you would like that as much as a 'real' gift.

Since I don't know you really at all, I havn't any ideas, but try to think of something you really want to do, but that is a mite bit to expensive..dinner out (at your favorite place not his) museam? art show? play? concert? )but not so expensive as your gift to him..which btw keep the whole reciprocation thing in mind next time ... sometimes a really expensie great gift costs more than the origional ticket price!)

and suggest it to him..better yet give him a strong hint like "I really wish I could see so and so in concert...I wonder if they are playing anywhere near here right now.."

of course pre check to make sure they are!

Fern · #9 (**permalink**) 12-13-2006, 09:13 AM

If you live near an urban area, how about a fun trip to a museum and lunch out, as opposed to dinner out, thus saving some money there?

rduell · #10 (**permalink**) 12-13-2006, 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fern

If you live near an urban area, how about a fun trip to a museum and lunch out, as opposed to dinner out, thus saving some money there?

We are extremely rural. Nearest museum is over 2 hours away.

pretty cheap jewelry · #11 (**permalink**) 12-13-2006, 07:52 PM

Dinner out is boring, and not memorable in the least, unless it is in Paris, that night.

Ask for a GPS for your birthday (about $100) and go geocacheing! This is sort of a real life treasure hunt. There are 'caches' EVERYWHERE placed by volunteers. Go to 'geocaching.com' or some such similar google. There is a fairly official group monitoring all this and they have a map on their site with little red dots where all registered caches are. There are red dots undoubtedly within a mile of you.

The hardest part is getting familiar with the computer stuff. But if you are on here, with a blog, you are plenty savvy.

Go to a good camp store such as REI for the GPS. Magellan is a really good brand. Have fun for many future years with this.