Messy House

[Thrifty Ray]

Here is a cure for ever feeling that your house is messy. The clip is about 18 minutes. I think this DH is about at wits end!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...23203228592640

[lillyb]

OMG!!! Totally speechless. I can't fathom it. I used to be a neat freak but have mellowed. Now it's just tidy but I despise clutter. Man!! The couple could quit their jobs for a year and make a good income off garage saling alone.

[Broken Arrow]

That is complete, utter insanity!

More than that, the house is an obvious fire safety hazard. I'm a bit surprised that the local fire marshall didn't condemn the place already.

[Thrifty Ray]

Ive had a couple of people watch the video and their reactions were the same...OMG.

Unbelievable!

[Ima saver]

I haven't watched it yet, but we know a couple that has the messiest house we have ever been in. There is no place you can sit, everything is full of stuff. The tables are all full. The kitchen is a diaster.

[kealina]

i haven't watched it yet but it could be related to hoarding...

[4TimesCharmed]

This is a sickness. We can look at this and say "OMG how can this woman live this way?" But she has a major problem that needs medical help. Her husband has obviously tried to no avail. I feel very sorry for this couple.

[PrincessPerky]

in all likelyhood she can't clean it due to her mental issues, and the guy keeps saying he 'asked her to leave him room' which isn't gonna help!

she needs help and he needs to not 'enable her' meaning quit buying crap amd start getting rid of it!

not that either is easy..but I so want to go declutter a closet now!

[PrincessPerky]

Here I go again, but in tht 18 minutes he could have made a path to the sink, or dishwasher....or cleared 'his bathroom' or a path in the house...instead he made a video....

now I am not saying it is easy...but do something before you complain about not doing....

Housework is 'never enough' you have to do something everyday..almost equal time is spent on cleaning as on messing up! (occasionally more, My baby can mess up some toys in seconds while even I take a few minutes to put them back!) It is hard, but imagine looking at that house...it is even harder if you skip!

I am so glad I force my kids to clean every day..they get a a good foundation of an important habit, and I don't have to spend too many hours cleaning.

[Thrifty Ray]

There is a story on the site about the guy writing to Oprah and Dr Phil to try to get her some help. She refused. Dr. Phil even tried to personally call her...again, she refused.

I have a feeling that any cleaning DH did was as effective as swimming upstream.

Clearly, this is a symtom of an illness and she needs help.

[Amorphous02]

My table is full too, some times, since i have a toddler , and i find myself making formula. Yesterday I washed dishes, cleaned out one drawer and one cabinet, got rid of junk, hand washed bedsheets and the baby clothes. Still there is so much to .. at least two solid hours of work. DH is another toddler: all junk mail is torn to bits and placed lovingly on the floor. His answer: what do you do all day?
Its like in the movie "Under Solen": it does not take long to clean a house, but it takes very long to keep it tidy.
What i dont get is that when one's house is not tidy , how can one let people in?

[PrincessPerky]

Heh, don't do anything all day let him decide if it is better or worse

my point was not that the man should clean the house alone and all will be well..my point is that by just sitting watcing her make a mess he is joining her in her troubles, rather than holding his own.

And my table is a mess right now too dinner needs cleaned up..soon as UE is done nursing!

[CheaplyClever]

I just watched the video and am amazed. The wife maybe sick BUT the husband should have never let things get that out of hand. He could have canceled the credit cards and thrown stuff out as soon as she brought it home. Something. You know the place had to smell awful. It made me want to know whatever happened to them.

[Amorphous02]

PP, LOL and ROL..now thats a great suggestion! The problem is that i was born to clean. My hands are always raw from cleaning and washing. (Hence the need for Eucerin coupons).

I feel that he must have cleaned a few times. got tired. But i dont believe that he would let people in unless they paid him. Where's their sense of pride and self respect?
BTW, totally loved Matchstick Men.

[Broken Arrow]

Well, according to the link and video, he's tried to clean it, and even hired professional cleaners to clear it out once. However, it got cluttered up again.

Supposedly, the video was meant to be used as proof to show the judge why he should be granted a divorce. The link stated that he got it without any problems.

[poundwise]

He may could have used the video and other evidence to get her non-voluntary help with her obvious mental illness.

Of course, we don't have all the info. I just agree with PP that he should have exhausted more extreme options. Calling Dr. Phil and trying to get professional cleaners were good ideas, but insufficient when dealing with someone who is irrational.

[PrincessPerky]

Originally Posted by Broken Arrow

Well, according to the link and video, he's tried to clean it, and even hired professional cleaners to clear it out once. However, it got cluttered up again. .

Once that is the point, cleaning isn't done once! it is done each and every day!

decluttering isn't done once either, it has to be continuous.

It is Never enough...just do it each and every day and it will be close.

[DivaJen]

I guess none of you who say all the husband had to do was X, Y or Z have never lived with someone with a mental illnes. When someone behaves irrationally, you cannot act logically and expect all to be well. That is to say, you can try to do what seems to make sense, but if the other person is acting illogically you are spinning your wheels. Taking away CC's and throwing stuff away may have accelerated the process of reaching some sort of bottom. I know for me it brought a relationship to the brink of violence and was the beginning of the end. You can't just talk to the person and think that's going to work, or take care of their messes for them.

[boefixepa]

Okay, I made this an office video and all three of us watched it and could not believe it! They need some serious help!

[CheaplyClever]

I asked my husband to watch the video and afterwards he said, "The man obviously doesn't have any b*##s."