[trillium]

That's a tough situation.

I think we need to start a "dealing with parental units" thread. While my situation is not similar (own my own home, getting rid of debt, good paying job), there is a certain level of expectation my mother (like your father) has come up with that because I'm making the $$$ I do, I should be the one to take care of her. I've been expected to buy TVs, CD players, and other "luxuries", and she's not afraid to ask out right for them when I talk to her on the phone. Yet, she's unemployed. Was laid off a few years ago now at this point and uses every excuse in the book as to why she can't go back to work. I feel bad for her, so I've tried to reach out to help her out (but not by out right giving her money) but she and her husband want none of the assistance. It's a bizarre mix of greed, laziness,and pride.

How do I personally deal with it? It's tough and thats even with the physical distances that is between she and I. I cannot imagine if this (or anything like it) were happening right in my own back yard.

And Christina, I'd have to say congratulations on the steps you've taken at your age to be frugal and saving you're hard earned money. I could have only wish I had the sense to do that when I was 17. Dave Ramsey is quoted as saying "you have to live like no one else in order to live like no one else". My take on this is make the sacrifices now to live financially free in the future. I just hope your dad can learn that and the lessons that you are trying to get him to open his eyes too.