I wear mine, and DH his..they don't match...mine is white gold and gold, with mini diamonds...his is a plain white gold band....
when I picked it I 'window shopped' found the perfect one..then window shopped for a cheaper version! Honestly I do wear it almost non stop (while pregnant I wear it on my necklace) so it had to look good on me..but as for material..eh..not to picky, but it does need to stand up to wear and tear of a housewife..no rusting in the dishwater!
Anyway..making a lifelong commitment IMO should come with an outward sign..but if you are not comfortable tell him..it is your wedding, and your hand..do what you want!
Only thing I wish I thought of, my engagement ring I never wear, the stone sticks up..so it 'catches' on things like kids hair....though I don't recall what you do.....
btw congrats!
