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I'm coming late to the discussion, but I just wanted to say you are a superhero for tackling these intimidating numbers. You are going to succeed--doesn't that feel great?!
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Yes it absolutely does!
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I think everybody has covered the main points, but just one more word of encouragement for cutting back on whole life policies for your kids and on 529 contributions. I am a parent too, and I hear you when you say you want to pay for their weddings, help with house downpayments, pay for college, etc. You want to give them a good start in life. Well, what good will a good start do them if they have to support you and your DH just when they're trying to support a family of their own? The best thing you can do for your kids is take care of yourself first.
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I agree...we are starting on the 7 baby steps of DR's and I'm starting to realize that also.
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One more thing: You don't have health premiums in your budget. That's probably one of the things that's coming out pre-tax and keeping your take-home pay low.
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Yes, my DH pays for them out of his paycheck pre-tax
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And I agree, the major goal is to be debt free, and then the goal is to have a sustainable lifestyle that relies ONLY on your DH's biweekly pay, leaving the bonus untouched for savings.
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I see this now. Hopefully soon, the bonus will be able to do that for us!