Try using cash for grocery expenses. Some call it the 'envelope system'. I just know it works for me. I use to be able to blow tons on groceries when I swiped the debit card. It didn't hurt so much cause I never really saw it leaving. But carrying cash really hurts when you spend it. And I watch prices so much more closely this way, as well. We cut the food budget about $400 a month by doing this one thing. When the envelope was empty, I'm done.
I believe Dave Ramsey's way of getting out of the lease would be to get the actual cost of getting out of the lease ($5,000, correct?), get a loan for that amount plus a few thousand more for a cheaper used car. Just because they're older and used doesn't make them junk. Mine's six years old and pushing 100,000 miles, but I wouldn't hesistate to drive it across America today. We keep our well maintained. Just for example, borrowing $8,000 to get out of the lease and getting a decent used car for $3,000 would still greatly reduce your payments per month along with your insurance. Three small children CAN fit in a sedan. (.. just thinking here.. $8,000 for 2 years at, say, 9% would make your payments of $365 per month, also reducing your insurance per month) My daughter drives a car we bought last year for $1,000. Roomy, comfy, and would go anywhere today. They are out there.
Great job cancelling the whole life!
For the house, I didn't really see that you are 'in love' with the home. If you were, you might think of keeping it. However, renting isn't a bad idea, either. At least until you're out of debt. Your goal of renting until this debt is cleaned up and then putting 20% (at least, but a good solid number) down is a good plan. Debt free, with a decent emergency fund, decent down payment... sounds great to me!