[akaivyleaf]

I emphathise with you. Its never an easy decision although I think I read in your post where you said your mom had previously gotten money from your grandfather? Am I correct to assume this is her father? Now I don't mean for this to be harsh, but... if she can call up her dad to get the money, she's never going to stop calling you for the money. That is what she's accustomed to doing and if her dad has been honoring her requests she see's nothing inheriently wrong with solicitiation.

Now I can futher imagine this is a tremendous burden on her father, the plight of the aging hasn't gone unchecked, but I would suggest that you talk to him about cutting her off, which might in turn make her come to you more, but when she hears "no" from dad she can't guilt it out if him. She can in turn remind you from whence you've come, but realize thats only because her other source has fizzled. If her father expects some measure of independence from her, she's more likely to listen than the same expectation from her kid.

My parentals (whom I'm not close to at all) sometimes call to get money from me! I laugh, wow it such a refreshing laugh, because they weren't my caretakers or guardians as a child. I feel none of the bonds of parent/child which leads to guilt and there is nothing they can do with me to convince me to loan them money. My other siblings which they did raise, have a much harder time saying no, and often find themselves trapped by perceived duty. In other words its as much necessity as a mind game and you have to cut the cord this time. However gently you do it, for your families sake, I think you must.