[flash]

Good advice, Baselle. It IS like alcohol or drug dependency. For my DB, he dreams of being ahead, but then spends it immediately. He took out his retirement funds to buy himself a christmas gift -- tools now for when he retires in 15 years, then told his kids he could not afford to get THEM christmas gifts. Hubby and I made up the difference for the kids, then DB got mad at me because he felt like a poor father. So this year, he said NO GIFTS for the kids, (but okay for him), then got mad because the kids were miserable. 4 kids, but he is recently divorced, and they only visit at the holidays and summer. BTW, he bought his wife AND mom the same orchid for Valentines last year, then couldn't figure out why his wife didn't think it was romantic. Mom sent him $10K to cover his cc debt, which he immediately racked up to 10K AGAIN. She sent him her SSI, and then said she could not afford her insulin and other meds, so guess who footed the bill? Totally crazy. I always say I will help the innocent caught in their wake, but not him, yet I always end up helping the people who help him. AGH.

No advice, here, but I do feel your pain! Thanks for the vent.