Jack,
I'm sorry your marriage lasted such a short time; but I think in the long run you've made the right decision.
I sort of wonder about her folks being here in the US. Are they legal? I sort of wonder if she wanted them to move into this condo of theirs and that "gift" of money was part of that. How large was this "only this one condo" that she had to have?
At any rate, I wish you well.
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Well_Spent,
Your attitude is the result of not having yet met the person that will be your SO. Know that if you marry someone for the short-term (intending to leave the instant someone "better" comes along), that so called "better" shouldn't necessarily "trust you" ; I know that I wouldn't, because you already left one other woman you previously committed to... how long before I'd be the second statistic? That thought would be in my mind; I wouldn't trust you enough to commit to you. You may not understand this now; but hopefully you will, given time.
We all change over time, that includes our attitudes about another. Frankly it's the being and caring of another human that makes people really want to "do, live and be." Enjoying life is not always easy to do when you are alone. And working together to make the relationship (and marriage) work, is also part of the commitment and love and sharing. For better or for worse.... and there will occasionally be fights and arguements.
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Maat55, your comments and attitude are much like I feel too for my DH. I know how much of a financial challange it has been for you and your wife... I'm glad that you and she feel the way you do.
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LAL, I'd be curious to know what your definition of soulmate is? I'm not sure, but I think I believe in the concept; as I've seen married people think alike, and feel very much like this is so for me and DH as well. Sometimes we don't really have to talk, we just know what each other is going to say or do or what we're each feeling.
But I also believe that you are correct that marrying late has some advantages; I think people are more tuned to who they are and what they want for a partner in life and maybe the 30+ crowd is a bit more understanding and flexible with their SO.
Not to say that the younger people do not have those characteristics.... but I think time does make us see things differently. Just a natural part of "growing up" seems to encompass our changing from an introvert to an extrovert.
Does having "missed" a soulmate that could have been, mean that you get no other? I agree , I believe that anyone can be a true partner and become soulmates.... I don't think we're limited to one chance though.
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