"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil...." 1Tim 6:10. Money is not the problem. The "love of money" is the problem. We are supposed to be a good steward of the money entrusted to our care, and I think that may be why you beat yourself up...you just want to do the right thing. The bottom line is you are probably to the extreme side of frugal. That is not all together bad, as long as you are not obsessive about it.
On the comment about women spending too much by somone....I've seen MANY men who spend too much on their toys. Spending problems is not a gender issue! (This is from a man who has plenty of "toys"!)
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