I could never have a separate account that my SO doesn't know about- it feels too dishonest to me. IMO, when you marry, you share everything. Keeping an account your spouse doesn't know about is, in my mind at least, a form of infidelity.
I do agree with the allowance. I think each person should be able to have some money they can spend whatever they want on without having to consult the other.
My BF and I are just dating, but we each know how much the other has. He has seen my bank statements and visa versa. I know how much he makes, how much he spends, and how much he saves- and he knows all that about me. We don't have any joint accounts, but I do think it is important that we know where the other stands financially. I would be very upset if I were to discover that all this time he has had an account I didn't know about. I would wonder how much he really trusted me if he felt he had to keep that secret.
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