Yes 10K is a lot of money. Sorry you are in this position. First, I personally would not loan money to relatives. I have given money to relatives and have made clear it was a gift with no repayment necessary or expected. If I cannot afford to make a gift of it or choose not to then I don't give them any money. There have been 3 occassions where we have given money to my BIL due to financial difficulties. However, he was recently in more financial difficulty and called to "borrow" money to pay his daughter's tuition. And, we had to say no to that one. We have our own children to think about and sorry but that was way too much money to part with. And, so his options were to bring his daughter home and and let her work a year (not a bad option), transfer to a cheaper school or borrow money from elsewhere which was what he managed to do.
ANyway, most likely the 10K will never be seen by you again and now the relationship will have a permanent blot. That is why I advise people never to loan to relatives as 9/10 times that is exactly what will happen and it will ruin the relationship.
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