Quote:
Originally Posted by Tree0164
You and your husband do sound like you need to mature and stop playing games with the money and the My wants are needier than your wants. If you don't it will cause a ton of stress on the marriage.
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Ok, this quote just pretty much irritated me. What do you know about how mature we are? I think I have done pretty damn good for myself considering when I came to this forum I was $12500 in debt and now I have it down to $9600 in a few days.
Maturity is a comment I never hear of being an issue... I am 26 and have FOUR kids... I have gone without grocery shopping for myself when DH is gone just so I can pay OFF a credit card instead of just paying it down. I finished my bachelor's degree in 2 1/2 years despite becoming a mother at 18 & 19. I had my son the day of my auditing final and we had to move 6 months before I graduated... but I still did.
So we made a few bad choices.... rationalized them for our kids. Part of the CC debt is a water softener we bought because of our son having such bad skin... the other was home renovations... I can account for every single thing that is on that credit card and have a plan in place to pay it off in February at the latest, possibly October of THIS year... considering we are $9K in debt and DH's bonus is ONLY $3K this year... I think that speaks for itself. I just haven't divulged the plan DH and I have talked about on the forum, its in my blog.
Right now we just need some guidance to help us prioritize and know which goals we can/should go for. And how to reach those goals without spending more than we need to. I'm sorry we aren't financially saavy as we should be for others at our age.... its not like we were ever taught about finances as a kid since we didn't talk about them... and my parents, although I love them dearly, certainly weren't great role models.
But tell me my argument doesn't make sense and show me how, tell me I could be doing something better and how/why... I'll actually sit and think about the points you make and will likely even say THANK YOU for it... but don't just judge me. So many people I've known in life have done that to me and did that to me when I got pregnant at 18 just out of high school. I kept hearing I'll never get my degree.
Not only did I get my degree, I had two more kids and still graduated when I was 22 and am going back for my masters. Ambition is one thing I don't lack... and coming across judgemental comments like the above just give me more motivation to prove people wrong.
And I do have to add... my marriage is one thing I am not worried about. Although we may get into a heated first discussion... we keep revisiting it till we come to a resolution we are both fine... nothing is ever a closed discussion. And when push comes to shove DH and I will push back our goals in the interests of our children UNLESS that goal is also seen to be of their benefit (such as buying a different home/neighborhood when our neighborhood started getting tagged by gangs and I found out I was pregnant with a fourth)... or like the water softener or my minivan. Thats when our judgement can get a little faded cause we want them in a good, safe neighborhood... I want them to be safe in a reliable vehicle I can trust... and I don't want my son's skin and allergies so bad as it was before we got the water softener.