[rooskers]

DebbieL

That sounds like a wonderful plan. I think from now on my wife and I will seperate our finances. With what she makes and I make it would be much better. I am going to have a New York steak tonight, expensive bottle of wine, and maybe get a massage. My wife I think will be lucky to be able to afford a glass of water and if she is lucky I might give her a saltine of mine. I like a nice hot shower when I wake up in the morning but my wife will have to do without because she can't afford her portion of the water bill. I think I will drive my new BMW to work because I can afford one but my wife will have to take the bus if she wants to go anywhere.

Ok so I am taking this over the top. It seems to me seperate finances work only if both people are working and make a similar wage. If one stays home to watch the children then you can't seperate finances. Also what happens if you save for retirement and he doesn't. At age 65 are you going to retire and at the same time tell him sorry hun you didn't save guess you will be working till you die. If he doesn't work are you going to divorce him or kick him out because he can't afford his portion. I guess I believe at some level a couples finances can never truly be seperated. Yes you can have seperate spending accounts for things you want but to seperate all your finances seems crazy to me.

If you aren't married and a commitment "till death do us apart" is not made then certainly those debt obligations of his are not her responsibility. However if she is truly commited to him then she can certainly help him but only to the point that if he left she wasn't financially ruined herself. Once they are married iit does become her responsibility too. This doesn't mean she should have to work her butt off and he can do nothing but it means as a "team" they should tackle the problem together.