I read maybe 70% of the posts. . .skimming by. . .but the one thing that struck me was you admitting to denying your husband $50 for a pair of shoes (which is on the high side of reasonable for sneaks, very reasonable for dress shoes). I consider this a request for an essential expense and then you dropped $50 on a Pampered Chef item, which like what. . .they charge $50 for a pair of salad tongs?
And then, the poor guy wants to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in his house and you deny him? What's that about? Would you rather eat every meal down at the diner?
I'd be frustrated too if I were your husband. . .I don't have the answer but I think the answer is a more of a psychological shift vs. a financial shift.
Sorry if this came across crass.
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