[GoodBuyGirl]

Originally Posted by FrugalFish

For years I've told myself this over and over again- that we need to spend what we feel comfortable spending and not a penny more. Heck, I preach it to others (or so it seems). I don't know why they spend so much- because they can? DH and I are not doing too bad with our life, but everyone around us is doing much better.

You (inadvertently?) make the point about why we shouldn't spend so much anyway- you say find something that they will love. The problem is we are not a close family, so I generally don't know what they will love (and frankly, none of them need anything), short of expensive video games and jewelry.

I would be happier not doing gifts with the adults at all, but that has always been a no-go when suggested. I'm feeling stressed enough about finances this year that I'm guessing we'll spend a lesser, usual amount, and after the gift exchange will feel lousy- like once again we didn't do enough! Ah well, sorry to rant.

Maybe you could just tell them you have already accepted an invite to another engagement and will be unable to attend.