HoooWeee no doubt you have touched a nerve here
Can you stand just one more itty bitty post?
I was in this exact position 14 years ago.
We both had fully functioning households before marraige.
We did not want more stuff, we did not know how to discourage more stuff.
Did we register? No, although there are way more places to creatively do so now (ie the camping store, Pier 1, etc.)
Did we ask for money? Yes, indirectly. Therein lies the uncomfortable part. You have to trust in that others will get the word around. Too bad your husband's business colleague (who is invited) doesn't know your Mother to be able to ask.
Did we get money? Yes. His family understood completely and without question.
Did we get stuff? Yes. We ruthlessly returned but nowadays return policies are tighter.
In conclusion? You will treasure the stuff you get and can't return anyway. It will be fun, believe me. Everything problem AFTER a wedding looks miniscule in hindsight.
GOOD FUTURE TO YA
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