I bet the upset in the family is more distressing to your child than moving to a new house. Stability is important, but stability is provided by the people more than by the the domicile...I, too, want to reinforce that you can't keep going on like this or even slide into a worse situation with rent higher than what it is now.
Your husband's qualification for social security disability is based on the disability, not on the spouse's income. If he collects disability insurance, he probably will also get Medicare, in which case he can probably get help with that disability, perhaps solving the problem as you suggest is possible.---But it sounds like it will be easier to decide on your own employment and living place than to deal with his reluctance to get help and/or get work.
In the time since your bankruptcy and then the foreclosure, have you actually accounted for every bit of your spending so that you know where it is all going? I ask because I am surprised to hear you say your gross $100,000 but your take home is $60,000 after taxes. Did I get that right? You had $40.000 in taxes? Are you speaking just federal income taxes or are you including all other taxes in that 40% hit on your earnings? Is it possible you are not paying that much tax, but have lost track of where substantial amounts of your earnings are being spent?
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