I don't see there being anything inherently "unequal" about expecting a man to pay during the earliest phases of courtship. It's just one type of social currency--there are plenty of "transactions" flying back and forth during dating.
I certainly didn't feel unequal to DH when we were dating, nor did I feel I owed him anything but honesty and the pleasure of my company. I do think it's only fair to only accept (and let a man pay for) dates if you have a sincere interest in him--none of this "dating for dinner" garbage.
Paying for dates is a pretty easy way for a man to not only put himself forward in an attractive light, but also to show they have an actual interest in a woman as opposed to just a passing fancy or hopes of a hook-up.
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Money can't buy happiness, but it's like a half-off coupon.
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