I can't thank you guys enough for all the valuable advice. I am going to go to the library this week and try and pick up that book if I can find it. My husband and I do not live 'expensive'. I mean, we don't wear name brand shoes or clothing, we don't drive expensive cars. I have a 2001 Ford Windstar that has quite high mileage. My husband DID have a very good point A to point B car that my mother gave us for free (!) but he wrecked it .... thus the payment to Shelter Insurance monthly
I have been arguing with Sprint for the better part of 3 years about our phone bill. I call, complain and they SAY they are adjusting it to the basics and my bill should be under $100 a month for both of our phones. Then, two months later, it's back up over $100! Our cable/ internet / landline phone are bundled through Charter cable, it's about $180-$200 a month. We live just south of Saint Louis Missouri.
I've checked into houses around here and a 3 bedroom home rents for no less than $950 or so.
Last year, we fell REALLY behind on our mortgage. At that time, it was $1224 a month. We spoke with the home retention department and they worked out a loan modification with us so that we were switched from an ARM to a fixed interest rate - which was a plus. The catch was they tacked on what we owed to our loan and that raised our payment to what it is now - $1425.27.
I have a really hard time managing money as does my husband. Neither of our parents were responsible financially with their money. We really had no one to learn from. We just were given a stand-up freezer to store larger packs of meat in, so I think that will help us out a lot.
The garnishment on my husbands check for the chapter 13 will last for 48 months. The bankruptcy trustee takes our income tax check (we usually end up with about $10,000!) so he changed his with holding so that he gets more money through the year instead of at the end of his year. He does participate in the 401K plan thank heavens. Now I haven't checked into the Flexible Spending program ... I never really understood how it worked
We both are at the point where we are ready to make whatever sacrifices we need to in order to get into a good place financially. I'm so worried over the fact that we don't have any sort of emergency fund whatsoever.
I've got three interviews this week ... so I'm praying that one of them will come through. I tried to explain to my husband that I don't want to lose our home ... I just don't want to keep spinning our wheels financially and ten years from now when our 13 year old is grown still have absolutely nothing.
edit:
Our grocery bill is really high. I do cut coupons and try to 'bargain' shop but I do tend to buy the 'name brand' soda, frozen pizzas and other items that I need to stop buying :-\. It would be a very hard thing for the two oldest of my boys to acclimate to but I think I should just start buying fruit etc. for them to snack on when they get home from school and before dinner. That would save a lot of money I think.