[Coleroo]

im on the fence right now about what to do. we have our first child due in may of '08 and im debating on getting a coverdell or a specific roth earmarked for spending (since contributions can be taken out at any time - and it doesnt have to be for education) --- or not doing anything and just teaching them how to find the best scholarships and choose the correct schools where debt wont be much of a problem.

I come from a family where college was never a necessity - it was always up to me if i wanted to go or not...All through school i was a strait A student at a private school and was valedictorian at graduation. my "big plan" back then was to be a teacher and go to a 4 year private college..... but... due to struggles with death of loved ones in my senior year, i laid out a whole year after high school to learn "who i was". Then i went for 2 years (for free, due to scholarship) to our best technical college in our state and earned 2 associates degrees in management and marketing (graduated with a 4.0)...i was earning more at the time of graduation from our technical school than i would have if i would have gotten a bachelors degree in teaching (plus i had no debt). i started back to college this fall in hopes of achieving my dream of being a teacher and furthering my degrees - but the loans i have realized that i have to take now hold me back tremendously....since management and early childhood doesnt cross over well, i would have 4 years to acheive a bachelor of early childhood along with certification in SC....i realized over the past few months that even at our cheapest university i would aquire a minimum of $30,000 in student loans. NO WAY will i graduate at age 29 and put my family in that much debt - so i am not going back next semester and will continue only with cash savings permit! before this fall i never realized how truly lucky i have been not to have had student loans! we have our own home, 2 new cars almost paid for, good savings & retirement funds, and a great life on the road to soon being free of everything but mortgage debt. As i see it, in my personal life track and plans, a 4 year degree with $$$$ in loans by age 22 would have been detrimental!! i would not be anywhere near where i am today if i had to accumulate THAT much debt that young.

that said, my parents didnt pay a dime for my college education. i would have never even thought of asking them. they paid for 13 years of private school and i considered that well above and beyond their call of duty.

then theres my husband who never went to "college" - he went to a WEMOCO trade school and earned a certificate in electrical. He's a hard worker and in the nearly 2 years he's been at his current job he's earned a 33% raise from his starting level with another raise expected in march. he's now earning more than what i, with my "college associates degree", was earning as head payroll specialist on a management staff.

So.... i guess i have a good while yet to decide where i stand. I know many for many families, college is a requirement but i was always taught that college is just another life track one can choose to take -- and there are alternative ways to go if college and its high cost doesnt fit into the plans.

I dont want my kids to feel pressured to go to college --- I watched way too many of my friends go to college (or worse - a certain college the parents liked) and then drop out, skip classes, fail or party their way through. They could have cared less about college! I also watched many graduate and then never put their degree to use - or just become stay at home moms. I want my children to know that college is not a "right" but a privelege to learn more in life.... i want them to understand that it opens doors if they want to focus on certain professions (i.e. a librarian needs higher degrees...a doctor needs higher degrees, etc). I also dont want my children to feel pressured to go immediately after high school either if they dont know their way in life --- and in the same sense, i will let my child start take college credit classes in high school if they're motivated.

So anyway... i guess my point being, I havent decided yet if i want to pay my child's college expenses so they'll be debt free upon exiting (neither i nor their father had to deal with large debt that early) or if i want them to find their own way in life and do it "the hard way" (scholarships, grants, working, etc).

YET, in the same vein i dont want my children to graduate at 22 with a multitude of loans! i detest student loans AND the idea of them. I think its horrible that america as a whole think its perfectly fine for a young adult to start life straddled with horrendous debt. Its NOT good and its not healthy emotionally.

One thing my husband and i have discussed (which we may end up doing) is focusing hard on teaching money value to our children, saving methods, investing as well as helping them focus on what they want in life ---- and then having a secret fund (probably a roth) set aside, and present half of our contributions to our child at 18 to help out with college should they choose to go, with a promise to present the 2nd half if they finish 2 years with high marks. If they choose that college is not for them, they still get the first half and the 2nd half, along with earnings, goes into our retirement.