Comments on: Why Parents Shouldn’t Pay Entirely For College

By: Jessica

Jessica — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 01:32:20 +0000

Parents shouldn’t feel like it’s their responsibility to pay for their child’s tuition. Once you hit 18 and move out of the house you need take responsibility for yourself. My parents paid my first semester’s tuition and I never attended class and flunked half of them. I even told my dad ‘what do I care, I’m not paying for it.’ I was a brat when he paid for it. I paid the rest of it (along with my own cost-of-living) and took pride in it all. I even landed a great paying job after college because I was told by the interviewer they have more respect for students who pay for their own tuition. It showed them I thought education was so important that I would do what I needed to to get it.

I learned a lot about taking care of myself and not burying my nose in the sand (or in beer) and having others take care of my responsibilities. My friends who had everything taken care of for them have no idea what it’s like in the real world and how to handle difficult financial times. Everything was always taken care of for them. Money came to them when they needed it without worry. Now their idea of handling difficult times financially is going to Florida instead of Mexico and expect it all to be fixed for them while on vacation. Then wonder why credit card balances keep going up and they have nothing in savings.

If parents want to help their children that’s wonderful, but you should be responsible for paying 50% of your own tuition and not rely on mom and dad to cover all your costs. Students miss on a great life lesson by being naive to the real world when expenses are 100% covered for them.

By: Lynn M

Lynn M — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 18:26:44 +0000

Good points. I think having the student be at least partially responsible for the cost is a good idea but if a parent does want to pay the whole bill some thing should be taken into consideration. If your parent is 100% financing your college education, then I think they should have some say on where you go and you don’t get to just choose a very expensive place to go because you like the location, the reputation, or because your friends are going there. You should also have shown a lot of responsibility on your own. Like having taken on employment during high school or during summer breaks and having been responsible with your money. Showing that you are capable of making good decisions is also an important factor. If these things can’t be said about you, then why on earth would your parents pay your way. Your prospects in college do not look good. While you might not have to pay for college, it is good if you’ve at least earned the opportunity to be there.

By: Meaghan

Meaghan — Mon, 11 May 2009 23:17:54 +0000

Children should be responsible for some reasonable portion. They need to feel invested in order to make the most of the experience.

By: kathy

kathy — Tue, 05 May 2009 18:44:12 +0000

When I went to my one and only year of collge my parents paid for it. it was only about $4,000 for the year back in 1980. i commuted to college. the next year i applied for a government grant but was denied because my parents made too much money. (both of my parents were high school drop-outs) My parents were not scholarship savy nor was I. Needless to say, i did not go back to college. Yes, my parents made too much but, not enough to send me back. I wish I would have had someone explain scholarships, student loans, etc. to me in more detail i was only 18 and so very young!!! my daughter will be entering college in the fall and we have been with her every step of the way as far the application process, scholarships, etc…..at the end of her 4 years she will have to pay loans of $15,000. we have helped her with the rest and she has scholarships also. so no, do not believe parents should pay for all of the college expenses.

By: persephone

persephone — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 16:29:26 +0000

Parents should help when they can help. Kids should work when they can work without hurting their grades. College is a time for kids to prove that they are responsible adults and they do not need the burden of tuition, room or board costs, but I agree that they should work during the summers or the school year to cover incidental costs.

By: spicoli

spicoli — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 13:19:19 +0000

It all depends on the student. I would not throw money away on a student who consistently fails to perform but I would gladly pay what I could for a student who excelled. I would rather fund my child through school than face funding him when he drops out.

By: typome

typome — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 21:46:54 +0000

I don’t think college students’ dedication to their education falls on whether they have a free ride from their parents or not. It comes from many years of instilling a desire to learn within the child, coupled with the gratitude that the student hopefully has for his privileges.

If I could, I would pay for my child’s education all the way. The fact that I plan to read to him or her every day, and nurture his or her gratitude, and imprint the excitement and importance of college early on will be a heavier factor on whether or not the child wants to blow off their college years.

By: Lou Russo

Lou Russo — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 20:48:32 +0000

I’m of two minds on this issue. When I went to college (in the ‘60′) my first two years, at a branch campus of Penn State, cost less than $400 per year. They were paid for by a small scholarship from my father’s union. I worked part time beginning in in freshman year. In my junior year, I transferred to the main campus of Penn State and my tuition and room and board were covered by student loans, which I paid back after I graduated (it too 5-8 years). My parents had little to give me, and I can’t remember them ever sending me more that $30 or $40 at a time. Needless to say, I lived frugally.

When my kids were born, I began putting some money into US savings bonds as a means of getting a head start on their educations. I knew full well that I would never have enough to pay for their entire educations. Both of them wound up borrowing the maximum allowed in order to complete their payments. I would say my wife and I contributed about 1/2 of the costs, while the rest came from loans and jobs. We helped with cars and insurance, but rarely with cash for spending money.

My son has paid off his loans, while my daughter, after a few financial missteps, is in the process of doing the same.

I have also begun small 529 accounts for each of my 5 grandchildren to help defray some of the ever increasing costs.
I just felt that what we did was the responsible thing to do, although I’m sure others would disagree.

By: Jackie

Jackie — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 19:53:03 +0000

When I first went to college, my tuition and part of my housing was covered by scholarships. My parents paid the rest and gave me $40/week of spending money (I already had a car that they bought me in HighSchool, an ‘89 Tempo). So essentially we both paid for school, scholarships from my good grades were my contribution and they paid for the rest. I hated school and dropped out. I didn’t appreciate the money my parents put forth until I was on my own, working full-time.

Fast forward to now, I went back to school and finished my BS finally, but now I have student loan debt. My parents still helped me financially from time to time, like one semester when I didn’t have enough money saved to both get textbooks and fix the brakes on my car. This second time I appreciated the help they occassionally gave me and the satisfaction of working while going to school. I was also extremely impatient with some of the school’s antics now that I was footing the bill, but that’s another story.

From my own experience, I have to agree with weakonomist – “Fiscal responsibility is born before college…” My parents were always very frugal and set a great example, but never made us kids follow their example.

I think that if parents can afford to help with college without hurting their own retirement then they should help. I also think they should set guidelines for minimum performance, they should make the kids work either p/t during school or f/t during the summer and should help their kids make good financial choices for their schools. Kids wanting to become social workers shouldn’t go into debt to the tune of $90,000 if they can get the same degree for $20,000 and have just as fine preparation.

By: David G. Mitchell

David G. Mitchell — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 17:30:22 +0000

I think I may have mislead some of my readers. I am not suggesting that kids should pay all of the costs associated with college. I agree that avoiding college debt is a huge first step towards success. My question, however, is where should the line be drawn. For me, I want to be able to pay for the cost of tuition, room and board. I want my kids to pay for the costs of their books, clothing, automobile (if they choose to have one) and entertainment. Without the car cost factored in, I think those costs will amount to about $100 per week — an amount that I feel they should be able to save or earn during the summers. That said, it is also an amount that will make them feel that they have a stake in getting good grades and performing well. I am wondering where others might draw the line.