Comments on: Can You Ever Really Be Financially “Ready” to Have a Baby?

By: Juno

Juno — Sun, 20 May 2012 23:45:07 +0000

I think the author was just sharing her plan based on the judgement she gets from people for waiting. Everybody is different. For example, I have a bachelors and masters degree worth of student loans to pay off. If I wait to have kids until after that is paid it will not be physically possible for me to have any. Trust yourself and your partner. The two of you agreeing as a team to do what it takes to care for your child is probably the most important thing. However, I do not think government assistance should be counted on. That is for short term emergencies.

By: Nichole

Nichole — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 12:15:49 +0000

What about the woman who makes more than the husband? And she is marrying a man with a child from a previous marriage? That’s a whole diff ball of wax too, don’t forget her! (Me). He told me we need to wait until we’re financially ready too…I agree….but it’s hard to swallow that reality. I’m 30, owe a lot in school and have my own plans in place financially. He’s in no place to support me full time if I stopped working. What would you all say to someone like me? And I know the man should take care of the wife, but times are changing and sometimes that’s not the way it is for most women.

By: Yuyu

Yuyu — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 00:15:37 +0000

we would never have any child if we prepared as perfect as what the author said. we are new immigrants from an asian country , both me and my husband working very hard, have a full time job, but as the economy doing down and the houseing price is never seem to dropping in L.A, we can barely wait for pregnent until we pay off a house. that’s impossible. Now i 7 month pregnent and still go to work , we never relly or thinking about relly on government syetems to rising a child, we believe we can still survived. why own a house should be the preority for having a baby, if so, 80% young people in california should never get married, not even mention to have a child. also i believe we are very responsible for our child even we are just working class in the U.S.A.

Dear author, according to your plans , the working class of United States should never have their next generation. so nazi

By: danielle

danielle — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 19:33:39 +0000

i think your article is interesting and i do applaud you for being responsible. that being said, i think that you are being unrealistic, unless you are about 18 years old. contary to popular belife, it is NOT that easy to get pregnant at any time in your life, but being older makes it THAT much harder. and if you are one of those people, all that hard earn cash you’re saving will be spend on infertility treatments and you’re back at square one, but i’ll bet you’ll be so happy you’re pregnant that you wont even care! now, if you are blessed to be able to have children without using infertility methods, then KUDOS. my point: you never know!

you might have a flood. someone might be in a car accident. ANYTHING could happen and your money could be GONE and then what…not have children?

i just caution you about being prepared: it STILL leave room for events in your life, no matter the amount of preparation.

it’s good your saving. and i would keep on. but you need to decide where your priortities are at.

me, well, i want to be a young mother (28 y/o mother to 22 month old baby boy) and i want to be young when i have number two. i plan as i may and things come up, but i’m still having baby number two. and i’m not on government assistance, but even it if were, i pay taxes and i deserve it!

so dont stick your nose up at us, the ones that dont plan to your degree, because i guarantee you’ll be WISHING you were us if you plan blows up in smoke.

nonetheless, though i found your article to be borderline snobbery (as well as subsquent comments) i still wish you the best of luck because being a mother is a truly joyous thing and i’m sure you’ll have a lot to teach your children…and you’ll learn alot from them too–like it’s okay to be messy and not have your ducks in a row cause kids are UNPREDICTABLE and a lot of WORK! lol..it’s great!

By: bud

bud — Thu, 14 Jan 2010 20:44:06 +0000

i hate this article. it taught me nothing.

By: Emily

Emily — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 17:23:11 +0000

There are a lot of people saying here that having a fulfilling family life, even if you don’t have dick for money, somehow makes you not poor. If you can’t pay your bills, you are POOR. If your living on welfare and relying on the government to help you get by so you can selfishly bring a child into the world, you are POOR and it’s the child that will suffer, not you.

Having a financial plan is not only responsible but NECESSARY. And any argument that says anything different is a blatant justification of a selfish decision. I don’t care how much “love” you have in your home, if you had that AND money you and your family would be better off.

Now, if you know you will never have money and there’s nothing you can do about it, go ahead and pop out those kids. There is nothing to “wait” or “plan” for.

By: Blue

Blue — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 19:58:33 +0000

Thanks Julia for giving me hope!

I’m nearly thirty and so I don’t have time to achieve very much on that list.

I haven’t got any credit card debt, but I can’t even imagine ever owning my home, let alone in the next few years.
My partner is still doing his PhD and I’m postdoc-ing, which means that I have no permanent job prospects either.

As for the car, I take consolation in the fact that people had babies before cars existed.

I’ll save as much as I can, but if I tried to be ready I think I’d have to wait until I was eighty.

By: Princessperky

Princessperky — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 19:59:53 +0000

Kim, It sounds like you want kids, but are afraid. Nothing will make that fear go away, in fact after 4 kids of my own I can say the fear increases in many ways!

But to me they are all 4 well worth it. sure we don’t have all the best everything, but we do have food and shelter, once those are taken care of most of the rest is like icing on the cake.

I still maintain your feeling is more important than financial security or lack therof, but I can’t tell you it will ever be a ‘sure thing’.

Also to anyone worried waiting will make them unable, adopt, it costs about the same as childbirth.

By: Kim

Kim — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 20:08:59 +0000

Princessperkey, thank you you made me feel much better. My husband and I have been married for 2 years and have been together for 6 years. I know that we are not completely financially ready but are you ever? We both really want to get pregnant but are worried that we won’t make it. I know that our parents would help all they could, especially since they don’t have any grandkids, ours would be the first. Does anyone have any advice for us? I’m lost on what to do, follow my feelings or follow the “general rules of pregnancy”?

By: Annie

Annie — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 00:09:54 +0000

My first question would be more along the lines of “why is it any of your business when (or even, if) we’re having kids?”

But that’s just me.

Regardless, I think if you can prepare as much as you can, as much as you’re comfortable with, do so. It’s your future and with or without kids, it will only be better if you have little or no debt to add to the stress, excitement, challenges, etc. ahead of you.